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The future’s dark

Posted in Marketing, Digital December 22nd, 2006 by Stuart Aitken

“Hello, before we connect your call, we’d just like to tell you that we are a bit busy at the moment…”

Back in October Orange faced a consumer backlash after thousands of users were unable to connect to the internet for more than two days. For many commentators this early indicator of Orange’s problems with its broadband service was further evidence that the once great British brand has lost its way under the ownership of France Telecom. For this commentator it was bloody annoying – and the situation is getting even worse.

There has always been a fear that as the major players in the communications industry seek to bundle, to offer triple-play and even quad-play, there would be an accompanying drop in customer service standards. Back in the old days Freeserve worked just fine. When it was bought up by Wanadoo again things went without a hitch. Now as an Orange customer who has faced over five weeks without broadband access I am forced to conclude that this bleak prophecy is indeed coming true.

A recorded message at the permanently engaged call centre rubs salt in the wounds: “We may be able to help you on our website at www.orange.co.uk“. Er…Of all the recorded messages in all the call centres in all the world this one is perhaps the most bizarre. It’s a bit like calling the AA and being told “Sorry we’re a little busy right now. Why not try driving your broken down car to the nearest garage?”

Call centres are of course Kafkaesque nightmarelands. Orange’s is more fascinating than this though. It seems designed entirely to make the user hang up. Over the last five weeks I have been told: “The problem will definitely be fixed within 48 hours”. No resolution. Two days later: “It will definitely be fixed within two days”. No resolution. Two days later: “The problem is being escalated and will be fixed within five days”. No resolution. Five days later: “The problem is being re-escalated and someone will call you within 24 hours with a resolution.” No call. 24 hours later: “I see no record of any line tests”. 

An angry letter does nothing and I ask for customer services. I am informed that there is no department called customer services, just “cancellations”. Well they might as well call a spade a spade. And so begins the process of informing all my contacts that I have a new email address.